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Post by donavan on Dec 6, 2016 19:42:37 GMT
Q: Who are the coolest blokes at the hospital?
A: The ultra-sound guys!
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Post by donavan on Dec 7, 2016 19:30:25 GMT
I was so cold this morning that my jaw started to freeze.. So I gritted my teeth.
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Post by donavan on Dec 8, 2016 17:13:58 GMT
I was sat on the edge of my bed, pulling my boxers off..........the wife said "you spoil them dogs"
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Post by Finntrovertigo on Dec 8, 2016 17:49:51 GMT
I'm guessing you don't have any trouble getting your dogs to roll over.
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Post by donavan on Dec 10, 2016 15:37:17 GMT
The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.
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Post by donavan on Dec 15, 2016 9:36:17 GMT
Advent calenders are losing their popularity. I think their days are numbered.
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Post by donavan on Dec 24, 2016 22:22:34 GMT
So I told my mum that I'd opened a theatre. She said, "Are you having me on?" I said, "Well I'll give you an audition, but I'm not promising you anything." Merry Christmas folks
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Post by donavan on Jan 1, 2017 12:47:41 GMT
Lollipop ladies... They make me cross.
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Post by peggs on Jan 4, 2017 2:15:27 GMT
Why did Mozart sell his chickens?
They kept saying, bach, bach bach, bach.
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Post by donavan on Jan 9, 2017 23:36:47 GMT
My wife and I often laugh about how competitive we are⦠But I laugh more!
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Post by sticksman1 on Jan 10, 2017 13:09:51 GMT
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak. (Me included!)
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Post by donavan on Jan 18, 2017 19:47:18 GMT
If a man is alone in a forest with no women to hear him, is he still wrong?
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Post by donavan on Jan 25, 2017 6:53:29 GMT
What's a specimen?
An Italian astronaut.
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Post by donavan on Jan 27, 2017 16:25:52 GMT
What's red and invisable?
No tomatoes.
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Post by donavan on Mar 12, 2017 12:16:25 GMT
"Mummy, where do babies come from?" "Well, daddies make sperm and put it inside mummies." "Do mummies eat it?" "Only if they want new shoes"
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