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Post by donavan on Feb 16, 2016 17:49:01 GMT
Post 'em 'ere.
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Post by donavan on Feb 16, 2016 17:56:12 GMT
My old Mum used to say, "Always give your food a rinse before you eat it." Lovely woman, terrible sandwiches.
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Post by donavan on Feb 17, 2016 23:47:11 GMT
My mum always used to say, "40 is the new 30". Lovely woman. Banned from driving.
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Post by Mr Tein on Feb 19, 2016 11:50:08 GMT
I swapped my old mums bed for a trampoline. Boy she hit the roof
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Post by Mr Tein on Feb 19, 2016 11:51:03 GMT
My old mum paid £1m for a ska band to play at her birthday party. Its madness
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Post by Mr Tein on Feb 19, 2016 11:51:59 GMT
Midwife for sale. Will deliver.
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Post by donavan on Feb 19, 2016 13:46:08 GMT
I'm making a complaint to McDonalds.
I found a chip in my salt.
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Post by donavan on Feb 19, 2016 13:48:27 GMT
If my balls come out on the lottery tonight, my career as a TV presenter will be in ruins.
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Post by Mr Tein on Feb 19, 2016 15:58:47 GMT
My friend put all his DOGGING equiment on ebay. Theres been no bids yet but there are 12 people watching
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Post by Mr Tein on Feb 19, 2016 15:59:19 GMT
My GRANDAD got his tongue cut our in the war but he doesn’t talk about it.
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Post by donavan on Feb 19, 2016 17:10:58 GMT
I got an e-mail saying 'At Google Earth we can read maps backwards!'
I thought, "That's just spam."
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Post by donavan on Feb 19, 2016 18:35:38 GMT
When William joined the army he disliked the phrase, 'fire at will'
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Post by bimble on Feb 20, 2016 8:47:33 GMT
Knock knock
Who's there?
David Bowie
David Bowie who?
How soon we forget......
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Post by bimble on Feb 20, 2016 8:48:09 GMT
By the way, great jokes, chaps!
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Post by donavan on Feb 21, 2016 13:32:34 GMT
My neighbour is in the Guinness World Records. He has had 44 concussions. He lives very close to me. A stone’s throw away, in fact.
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