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Post by anothersatellite on Jan 28, 2020 21:15:36 GMT
Granted. Your mind and your body are up for grabs, though...
Wish I had saved money in my youth.
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Post by Finntrovertigo on Jan 29, 2020 2:48:14 GMT
Granted--eighty years ago, you saved Money, a dog slated to be euthanized. Later, Money went rabid and killed seventy-four people, or euphemistically put them to sleep.
I wish I hadn't inadvertently jabbed myself underneath one of my fingernails with a pin.
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Post by anothersatellite on Jan 30, 2020 21:18:41 GMT
Granted. You did it on purpose, and you're slowly becoming obsessed with doing it again.
I wish I were kinder.
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Post by donavan on Jan 31, 2020 9:25:37 GMT
Granted. You are now kinder more unkind.
I wish I didn't have to go grocery shopping today.
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Post by Finntrovertigo on Jan 31, 2020 15:39:41 GMT
Granted--a tornado has deposited a supermarket on top of your house.
I wish I didn't have to trim my toenails.
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Post by Terra Incognita on Feb 4, 2020 15:19:15 GMT
Granted -- Your feet have been bound per old Chinese custom. Enjoy your new ingrown toes!
I wish my vacation in the sun hadn't ended so soon.
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Post by Finntrovertigo on Feb 4, 2020 23:27:51 GMT
Granted--climb aboard this rocket that will shortly be launched into Sol.
I wish I wasn't suffering from dry skin on my face.
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Post by anothersatellite on Feb 8, 2020 15:28:05 GMT
Granted. Too bad about that itching, flaking sac o' thine...
Wish I weren't so uncomfortable in my own home.
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Post by Finntrovertigo on Feb 8, 2020 16:41:20 GMT
Granted--now that your house has burned down, you can be uncomfortable in what remains of your front yard.
I wish I didn't have to shovel snow.
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Post by donavan on Feb 9, 2020 11:20:08 GMT
Granted. You are visited by a herd of elephants. You now have to shovel shit.
I wish I had more self control.
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Post by Terra Incognita on Feb 26, 2020 22:52:15 GMT
Granted -- Your self-control now extends to formerly automatic body functions, such as blinking and digesting. Remember to keep that heartbeat going!
I wish I had even an ounce of musical talent in me.
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Post by Finntrovertigo on Feb 26, 2020 23:05:18 GMT
Granted--you are now the world's greatest bagpiper.
I wish cats would stop confusing my porch for a toilet.
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Post by donavan on Feb 27, 2020 18:39:43 GMT
Granted. Your toilet is now confusing your porch for a cat.
I wish my no booze diet finished tomorrow instead of a week tomorrow.
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Post by Finntrovertigo on Mar 15, 2020 0:36:04 GMT
Granted--unfortunately, your no-getting-kicked-in-the-balls diet has also just ended. You have a lovely soprano voice, by the way.
I wish I hadn't gotten stuck behind a funeral procession on the way to work earlier.
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Post by Terra Incognita on Mar 18, 2020 22:55:23 GMT
Granted -- you are now right in the middle of the procession, lying in the pine box. Say hi to Andy for us!
I wish there were no such thing as squid-flavoured chips.
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